Labels: Pom, Manolo Blahnik, gay, straight, bi? Which one fits you?

This morning began with an interesting conversation with my housemate Catherine. She had been delivering the cold shoulder since the Neanderthal night, leaving me perplexed about what I had done. "I have been seeing Calum in secret," she says. Slightly confused, I go "ok" (yes the same guy that pretty much asked me out). "It just sort of happened. It is not serious but I really like him, we don't want John to find out," she says. That would be her ex-boyfriend and his best friend. I didn't have much time to chat and had to run out the door to work. But an interesting development.

After work today I decide to beat the tube strike and head out to All Bar One at Holburn with my GBF (gay best friend). Harry and I met at university and worked a little while together as reporters in our home country. I have always thought Harry was gay and finally, about six months ago, he came out. I faked shock. He hasn’t told the rest of our friends who will of course not be surprised.

But then tonight he threw in a curve ball. “I’m not sure if I am gay”. “Ah... ok”, I say. It turns out that stubble and hairy chest just aren’t doing it for Harry anymore. He was a rather late bloomer. Now 31, he had a few female encounters before trying the men in his late 20s. There is no doubt that he is attracted to men. Definitely not straight. But just as it is taboo in some circles for a heterosexual man to be gay, in the gay circles being bi just doesn’t go down well. But I was very shocked when he said he imagines himself with a wife, home and kids, settling down in our home country. “Do you think it is just the kids you want?” He told me it was the complete package.

I do some counselling asking him about his parents’ divorce, stereotypes he has grown up with. We conclude that he probably is attracted to both men and women. Although, I am not really convinced. I think the casual sex that is all about the physical and not the emotional could be the real reason why he isn’t all that turned on by his random and fleeting sexual encounters. By the end of the night we decide that Saturday night we are on a mission: to the straight bars to pick Harry up a girl.